The 'To-Be' List
‘To-be or to-do’, that is the real question.
[...not exactly a Shakespearean quote, but close enough!]
How are you doing? Nope, not what are you doing or how you’re feeling about what you’re doing/not doing. How are you doing what you’re doing?
In other words, how are you being? When you take away all the physical activity and mental processing, you know, the stuff that makes you feel productive, valuable, and likable, then what are you left with?
During this time of quarantine, I’ve been reflecting a lot on my chosen way of being, which often is so automatic that I mistakenly believe that the way I’m going through life is simply the way I’m supposed to be in order to get things done. And if I’m not getting things done...then what am I doing?! [besides replaying another episode of ‘Never Have I Ever’, which I have zero shame about!]
Speaking of streaming entertainment! I went through the first 6 weeks of self-quarantine only allowing myself to watch a couple movies and absolutely no shows because I wanted to stay in a productive state as much as possible. Staying at home hasn’t suddenly give me all this extra time. If anything, my to-do list is just getting longer and more demanding! I’ve thought to myself, “If I can’t get my 💩 done now during this shutdown then how will I ever be productive enough post-pandemic?!”
I’ve found myself in a constant race against myself. Rushing from one thing to the next.
‘Why can’t I chop this celery freakin’ faster? I gotta hurry up and make this dang juice, so I can drink it, wait 20 minutes, and then eat breakfast [that I’m also whipping up in record time], so that I can get on to the next thing I gotta do. Just. Move. Freakin. Faster! Go, go, go! But stay inside, of course!’
What do I gain from this way of being? Maybe an extra minute. And what have I lost...other than my mind? When I go about my day as if I’m in a race that never ends, there is very little space for enjoyment and gratitude...and simply being.
The truth is, I love the life I get to live and the people with whom I get to share it with. Even on the roughest of days, I know that no matter what, I’ll make it through someway, somehow. But often in the tornado of my to-do list trance, I forget that life doesn’t happen because of what I do; time will pass and the earth will spin just fine without me. And if I don’t slow down enough to enjoy every hour and appreciate each breath I’m blessed with, then I’ll miss life entirely.
“Life is what happens while you are busy making other plans”--let’s not miss it!
My daily responsibilities might not always be my first choice for optimal enjoyment of life, but how I go about completing those tasks is always up to me.
I can make to-do lists all day long, and usually I enjoy it, until the stress of my ability to get it all done starts to creep in. Most of the time, I’m not even aware that I’m stressed. Instead it’ll show up as a slight headache from clenching my jaw or snapping at an innocent person asking a question (sorry, Wes!).
What if my guide for the day was a ‘To-Be’ list instead? A reminder of how I want to feel and move through my day, regardless of what’s getting done or not. How do I want to be today? I envision this list as simple and straightforward as possible, not even using words--how about an emoji or two instead?
This was my ‘To-Be’ list last week!
I know it might sound silly, but let yourself have fun with it! When I see a thumbs up emoji, it makes me think of having a positive attitude and not being critical/judgmental. Star eyes is having a sense of wonder and awe, peace sign means staying chill, prayer hands represent an attitude of gratitude, and hearts around my face is feeling the love from any person, place, or thing, no matter what. The same emojis can represent different things for you.
If finding joy and gratitude within each day is your objective, what emoji(s) would you place on your ‘To-Be’ list?
And one last thing. This isn’t a list to check things off of. It’s a reminder of who you already are and the attitude/feelings you want to stay connected with throughout the day...sometimes all the doing makes us forget. We’re called human beings and not human doings for a reason, right?
<3 G